30-Minute Content Roast with Samoa
Stop Watching $30K Clients
Scroll Past Your Content
— and into your competitor's DMs
Find the exact positioning mistakes repelling premium buyers (and what to fix) in 30 minutes
— without overhauling your brand, guessing what's broken, or spending $15K on a guru who tells you everything's "perfect"
You're posting. You're showing up. You're doing the damn thing.
And people ARE sliding into your DMs. They're asking about working with you. They're interested.
But then you get on a call and it's: "So what's your payment plan situation?" or "Could we maybe start with something smaller?"
or my personal favorite - the long pause after you say your price followed by "oh... wow... okay let me think about it."
Ma'am. Your offer is $20K.
Why does everyone in your inbox have a $3K budget and a dream?
Your content isn't broken.
It's just out here actively recruiting budget shoppers while premium clients scroll right past you into someone else's DMs.
There's something in your language - something you literally cannot see because you wrote it - that's screaming "I'm for beginners!" or "I'm negotiable!" or "Please ask me about payment plans!"
Maybe it's the way
you structure your posts.
(Educational content that teaches so well they don't need to hire you? Cute.)
Maybe it's specific words
you keep using.
(Industry jargon that attracts people who just learned what your industry IS.)
Maybe it's what
you're NOT saying.
(The positioning gaps that make premium buyers go "this isn't for me" without knowing why.)
You think your content is great. And honestly? Maybe it is. For someone trying to attract $3K clients.
But for the $10K-$50K buyers you actually want? You might as well be invisible.
Introducing The Content Roast:
30 Minutes of Me Telling You What's Actually Wrong
This is a live call where I rip apart your content and show you exactly why the wrong people keep showing up.
You choose what I roast - your Instagram, your website, or your sales page. Send me the link before our call. I'll come ready to drag it (affectionately).
You'll walk away with:
At least 3 specific things to fix - not "maybe consider trying" suggestions. Actual changes. Words to swap. Structures to shift. Things you can implement immediately.
Your "OH SHIT" moment -
that thing where you finally see WHY your content attracts budget shoppers. It's usually something small. Something you'd never catch yourself. And it's been silently repelling premium clients this whole time.
The positioning gaps -
where premium buyers are looking at your content and subconsciously deciding you're not for them (even though you absolutely are).
This is for you if:
→ You're making $70K+/yr and charge (or want to charge) $10K-$50K
→ You're getting inquiries but they all need monthly payment plans for a 5-figure investment (baby, this is not Klarna)
→ You KNOW your work is premium but your content didn't get the memo
→ You want someone to just TELL YOU what's wrong instead of spiraling in Canva at midnight wondering if it's your fonts
→ You can handle direct feedback without crying (or you can cry, I don't judge)
This is NOT for you if:
✗ You're getting crickets (that's a visibility problem - you need eyeballs before you need positioning)
✗ You're still figuring out what you sell or what to charge
✗ You want me to tell you everything's great (book a session with your mom for that)
✗ You're not ready to hear that your "amazing content" might be the problem
The Investment:
$250
30 minutes. Live with me. At least 3 specific fixes. Zero fluff. Maximum "oh shit, THAT'S why."
I only do 3-5 of these per month and they book out fast. If you want in, grab your spot now before you spend another quarter wondering why the wrong people keep showing up.
FAQs
How does this work?
You pay, book your 30-minute slot, and send me the link to whatever you want roasted. I review it before our call like a detective investigating a crime scene.
We hop on, I walk you through everything that's broken and exactly how to fix it, you leave with at least 3 things to change immediately. Simple.
Can I record the call?
Yes. Please do. You're gonna want to replay the part where I point out the thing you've been doing for 2 years that's been repelling premium clients the whole time.
What if I want you to look at my Instagram AND my sales page?
Pick the one that matters most to your revenue right now. 30 minutes is enough to go deep on one thing - not shallow on two. If you want both roasted, book two sessions. I don't make the rules. (I do make the rules. That's the rule.)
What if my content is actually fine?
Let me tell you about my client Jess. She paid $15K for a VIP day with a guru. When she asked for feedback on her website, the coach told her it was perfect. Chef's kiss. No notes. Stunning.
She knew something was off because she wasn’t getting the conversions she wanted, so she did a Content Roast with me. I found tons of positioning upgrades. She told me this $250 session was worth more than the $15K she spent on that VIP day.
I'm not here to gas you up. I'm here to find what's actually broken. And in every roast I've done, there's been at least one "oh my god, THAT'S why" moment. Usually several.
What happens after I book?
You’ll fill out a short form to submit the content you want me to roast. After that, you’ll receive a confirmation email with your Zoom link. Then we’ll meet on the call and I’ll roast your content live.
Is this going to be mean?
Direct? Absolutely. Mean? No. I'm not here to make you feel like garbage - I'm here to show you what's not working so you can fix it and start attracting the clients who can actually afford you.
Think "tough love from your smartest friend" not "Gordon Ramsay having a meltdown."